What a mess!

Okay
I. am. confused.

Who would have thought that having choices was a bad thing?
Yes I know all of you that commented before told me so ... haha
I can hear it now in unison "WE told you so!"
Ok Ok now I get it. Thank you :)

Let me explain my self:
I thought that having choices was a good thing - you know - so you can compare - and get the best of the two.
But now I realize that guys are not like shopping for jeans. Narrowing it down to which checks off more points on your "list" of what you want in a pair of jeans is not the same as narrowing it down to whom ever checks off more points on the "perfect man" list. Why? - some points are more practical, and other points are more attractive - but different emotions run deep into these points as well.

Me = inexperienced dater. Yes I admit it. (Gasp!- I know you are not that shocked haha - So smack that big ol' "L" on my forehead and carry on reading!)

Until recently I have just been the one who - when put on dates - say - set ups or blind-ish/internet dates (as opposed to just naturally getting to know someone) I usually assess pretty quickly. Yay or nay. And most have been Nay - since Im extremely picky - No to bad teeth, No to no chemistry, No to someone who doesnt like me enough, No to ultra feminine men, No to guys who tell me before the date has begun "I have to leave early, I have somewhere to go", No to guys on a different wave length, No to pushy/stalkerish men, No to guys who dont get my jokes, No to guys just passing through town for a night or two, No to scruffy older biker men, No to men with son's closer to my age than I am to their age. Thats alot of NO's. And Im tired.

So maybe it is really: Me = inexperienced in giving guys a chance dater.

Now, in my senior years (or something close to it, it seems haha) I keep thinking "well I should try to give more ppl more of a chance".
Or maybe that was my eggies screaming at me again? Whatever.
Recently I come to realize that it can take me a long time to find my self attracted to really nice guys when I wasnt initally attracted to them. Mind you I was not grossed out by them either. Maybe they would be called average? Maybe I wouldnt even do a "double take" if they passed me on the street.(which is not a bad thing btw). This works well when you are around someone who you are not out to date - someone you know naturally. And I also know it is worth it when you do end up with them etc. But this concept is hard to apply to those you are initially going on a date with.

Here is where I try to explain my situation ---- cryptic mode.

Gone on some dates.
With a couple of guys.
More than once.
One guy is soooooo goood to me, I can tell he really likes me, it shows in his actions, he is established, similar background and similar family view, gentlemanly, treats me like the lady I am (psssh - stop laughing at that).
But with this guy - attraction would rate at - hummm 30%? When Im out with him its great he gets cuter - somewhat. When Im not out with him and we talk on the phone - Im bored, and slightly feel smothered and annoyed.

Other guy is well..... "meh" to me. I feel he is neither here nor there. If I turn him down he will be cool with it. If I tell him I like him he will be cool with that too. He's ok to me. Passive somewhat. BUT get this - He tells me he is attracted to me and thinks I'm really sweet and would like to date me more. Only thing he keeps talking about that we have in common is our work backgrounds. Unsure if he has the same family views as I do - he probably swings more liberal than myself. But when we go out he is fun and the date is really great and I'd like to do it again..... and dang he just keeps getting more good looking! Kinda makes me feel mushy. So attraction would be at - uh 90%.
Thing is, when we dont go out - there is practically nada convo/ chating/ emailing/ texting/ phoning. He asked if we could go out again. I said Im not feeling that he's that into me really. He re-iterated how he enjoyed going out with me, thinks I am very sweet and he is attracted to me and would like to go out again. Who knows - maybe being honest about what I thought was misinterpreted as sorta "fishing for compliments" sort of thing.

Ok - I realize that wasnt cryptic at all. It was pretty straight forward.
But none the less, Im left confused.
It looks like there may be an obvious answer there doesnt it? Maybe, maybe not. But its not an easy answer when I go out with them.
I am pulled by emotions and my head and all that messy stuff.
I dunno - maybe time will tell. But meanwhile I feel guilty of sorta seeing two guys at once. Though technically - they are just friends right now anynow right?