He is not serious is he?!

My gf was telling me about her date last weekend. She was set up by people she knows. She already went out on a first date with the guy, lets call him J. After the first date he showed her off at a posh place he used to work and everything was free for them. He did not seem to show off about it, he seemed ok. He seemed like a real gentleman.

So last weekend was date # 2. He took her to a very expensive restaurant.
During dinner J says "You know, I only do this (eating out at expensive restaurants) for special occassions" (Um date #2 is a special occassion? Ok whatever)
He goes on to explain "I cant do this all the time you know..." HUH? What was that? What does he mean by that?! She never asked him to take her there! What a way to make her seem like a burdon on his pocket already....
To top off his wonderful tactfulness, at the end of the dinner he says "How much do you think that dinner costs?"
My gf is taken back, but answers the question " Uhhhhhh ohhhh wellll ..... maybe $130 or so?!?"
J "Yeah thats right, about $150 right?! - well, since I know the manager he only charged me $78! Isnt that great huh? Thats such a good discount, right?"
"Um Ya it is" my gf says feeling uncomfortable, guilty and very turned off.
What the?! Is he really serious??! Gah!

So many issues here.
The one I want to mention is that: its not so much how much a guy spends on a girl, (in fact I would rather not know)..but its how he treats her - makes her feel that she is worth going the extra mile for, not constantly reminding her how much he is doing for her as if it were a burdon! If he had more real tactfulness and was a sincere gentleman yet took her to East Side Marios, I think she would have been much more impressed with him.
Now, this being said, I know that not all gals think this way. There are the gold diggers that spoil the rest. But the average gal wants someone that makes her feel special, that is humble, not showing off, someone that treats her like a princess.
Before all this, I kept telling my gf what I want in a guy, I had a hard time explaining it. Im not a frivolous gal but in the end...
I want someone that treats me like a princess, that treats me as something he thinks is special, something that he wants to take care of, and someone genuine in his actions.
I still dont think that I explained it well but she kinda understood the point I was trying to make now that this happened.

(I know I may get some flack from those guys out there that say - well thats not reality or ya sure but if he was dirt poor you would not like him would you?!.......... but that is a totally different post to explain anyhow)

I think that if you listen closely and observe closely, you can tell those guys that just say things or do things only because they wanta "git wit ya" and those that are really, sincerely, into you.
Its not the actions only or the words only - its both.